Lade Tawak’s A Couple of Things – Letter #017: Living & Dying

Welcome to a new week. Is it me or is January going by faster than usual. 

Sometime since the last letter, I facilitated a session to help people create Digital Vision Boards (digital over paper, save the environment and save yourself time). One of the participants already got some great news since the class and I’ve gotten messages from a couple of others about how helpful the exercise was in clarifying their goals and next steps.
Thing #1: Living with yourself

Something I wanted to do when I was a child was be an OAP. I don’t talk about it a lot because it seems very random. Recently, that dream has transferred into the desire to host a podcast (without the attendant worries of pre and post production). So, I tweeted this and got the opportunity to do a Women in Design series for The African Tech Woman Podcast.  

I’ve been doing this over the past week, and a common theme from most, if not all, of the interviews is that it’s important to figure out why you’re doing something before you even start.

Before you start a career step or move in one direction over another, be clear to yourself about your expectations. Are you in it for the money? Are you trying to develop a new skill? Switching careers? etc. This will help guide the decisions you make: whether to go freelance or combine a full time gig with a side hustle; whether to take a pay cut for a job with greater responsibility or stick to your better paying job; whether to work with this client or that client and so on and so forth.

Something to note though is that purpose can shift. So, say I took a lower paying job because I believed I could gain some new skills or it’s in a new field. Once I have achieved what I came for my purpose can change to making a lot of money because I want to save money for a long term goal like going to grad school. Or it could be work at company or on project that will increase chances of working with Professor Y at School Z.

The point is that what’s important to you at certain points in life will always change. But with all of that in mind, there should be core personal values that you have that are almost unshakeable, and it’s up to you to decide whatever that it.

The best thing about doing this is that for every decision you make you can give (yourself) a clear justification for it and you’ll be happy with yourself.
Thing #2: Living with others 

Human beings do not exist in isolation. Even if you live alone and you have a remote job that allows you work from home, you interact with people in different ways, whether online or offline.

For “living with others”, I want to narrow down on romantic relationships or sharing a flat with others.

Every other day, there’s some weird argument on twitter about what would you do if your partner presses toothpaste from the middle but you like to press it from the bottom or what if you like to sleep with the lights off and the other person likes to sleep with it on and so on and so forth. Majority of the responses/advice always tends towards *gasp* this is no way to live and you must break up. Now, I don’t know how (un)serious these people are about these takes, but it’s starting to get on my nerves. These are really simple issues that can be compromised on.

For the toothpaste issue, give everyone their own tube. For the light issue, sleep in different rooms, get a night light thingy, or turn off the lights in your room, but leave on the light in a corridor or bathroom (for example) that brings in some light to your room. If you like to relax while on vacation and the other person is basically Dora the Explorer, then split your holiday into two, use the first half to explore while you relax for the second half. 

Obviously, if differences are on fundamental core values like being a generally good versus generally shit person OR integrity/honesty over crookedness OR holding racist/tribalist/sexist/homophobic/bigot beliefs versus not, then get the hell out (and these even for friendship) but for all these other simple things, there’s definitely some compromise that can be reached that suits both your personalities. Even if it means living in separate houses
Thing #3: Designing your own death

A note before reading this section. This section isn’t necessarily about suicide resulting from mental illnesses, but more about whether people should be able to choose when/how they want to die.

________________

I was reading this Aeon essay on choosing how we die  and it got me to think about something that I do on and off. I often think about at what age I want to die. Mostly because I don’t want to be a burden on other people in my old age and also because I don’t want to suffer from the “indignity” of having to be taken care of and not being able to do things for myself due to slow but certain ageing. 

It’s possible that you could lose your major functions even before old age: a car crash could leave you immobile, a family history of some illness, a rare disease etc. But all things being equal, and life being particularly fair to me, then it’s old age that’ll get me.

Anyway, I’ve always thought somewhere between 75-80 years would be the perfect time to die. Hopefully in my sleep without any major illnesses or disturbances. I think that age range is perfect because I’d have done all the exploring I want to do. I don’t plan on having kids but should that change (through adoption), they’d probably already have their own children by the time I’m 80. Again, with God and luck on my side, I’ll be in great health. So, what else is there.

Sometime ago, I stumbled on an article in The Atlantic that perfectly summarizes my thoughts on dying at 75.

At the end of the day, death itself doesn’t matter because that the end of life as is it now (whether you believe in resurrection or not). What matters is living a worthwhile life (whatever that means for you) while you have it.
Reflect and/or ReplyWhat’s your current guiding light for your career decisions?How do you handle differences in behaviour with/from your partner?Have you ever thought about at what age you’d like to die?
– END –
The Dynamics of Modern Design: The Principles and Characteristics You Need to Know
The Dynamics of Modern Design: The Principles and Characteristics You Need to Know

The Dynamics of Modern Design: The Principles and Characteristics You Need to Know

visualhq June 27, 2022 Design Startups Web 3 0

When we think about the design world, our minds immediately go to images of people sketching on whiteboards or creating 3D models in digital software. Design is something that’s visual and comes from a person’s mind, so it makes sense that we keep seeing these

Read More
Why Intuition is The Key to Building a Strong Brand
Why Intuition is The Key to Building a Strong Brand

Why Intuition is The Key to Building a Strong Brand

visualhq June 27, 2022 Branding Marketing 0

  Brand recognition is the result of a combination of factors. There’s no magic formula, or single piece of the puzzle, that will guarantee brand equity. But in today’s crowded marketing landscape, intuition plays an essential role in building a strong brand. With so many

Read More
How to Get Ready for Web 3.0: What the Future of Online Marketing Looks Like
How to Get Ready for Web 3.0: What the Future of Online Marketing Looks Like

How to Get Ready for Web 3.0: What the Future of Online Marketing Looks Like

visualhq June 27, 2022 Branding 0

Welcome to Web 3.0 — a world where artificial intelligence and chatbots are commonplace, and websites are no longer the primary medium for online marketing. As the Internet continues to evolve, companies that fail to keep up with these changes risk being left behind. How

Read More
The Value of Strong Brands in a Competitive Market
The Value of Strong Brands in a Competitive Market

The Value of Strong Brands in a Competitive Market

visualhq June 27, 2022 Branding 0

The digital world is filled with brands that have gone from anonymity to household name. These fast-growing companies are proof of the power of a strong brand and how it can drive growth. In today’s marketplace, consumers are more brand-conscious than ever before. In fact,

Read More
How TikTok Is Changing The World
How TikTok Is Changing The World

How TikTok Is Changing The World

visualhq June 27, 2022 Branding Creative Culture 0

Social media has become a significant part of our society. As of January 2019, there are 2.7 billion global social media users — that’s 62% of the world’s population and an increase of 25% in just three years. Social media has completely changed how people

Read More
The Future of African Startups – 5 Key Points to Consider for Your Startup
The Future of African Startups – 5 Key Points to Consider for Your Startup

The Future of African Startups – 5 Key Points to Consider for Your Startup

visualhq June 27, 2022 Startups 0

In the last few years, we have seen an increasing number of African startups emerging and disrupting various industries. The growing digital economy, availability of affordable internet and mobile phone tariffs, coupled with cheaper online software development kits have all contributed to this upsurge in

Read More
Communicative Design: Branding Ideas to Improve Customer Trust
Communicative Design: Branding Ideas to Improve Customer Trust

Communicative Design: Branding Ideas to Improve Customer Trust

visualhq June 27, 2022 Uncategorized 0

Societies are more connected than ever, which has resulted in a greater number of customers and a higher demand for products. A recent report from McKinsey revealed that e-commerce sales will grow from $1.1 trillion in 2016 to $2 trillion by 2021. With the rise

Read More
5 Trends That Will Change The Future of Branding
5 Trends That Will Change The Future of Branding

5 Trends That Will Change The Future of Branding

visualhq June 27, 2022 Uncategorized 0

Branding is an important part of any company’s marketing strategy, especially if you want to differentiate your business and stand out from the competition. The branding process involves creating a recognizable image for your business that you can market through different channels. A strong brand

Read More

Filter Options

Browse by

Categories

Price